Room of riskiness
by ninjamonkeybutt
Summary: Crack fic! A group of Hogwarts students alone in the ROR for fun & games


Disclaim – not related nor belonging to me; this is a crack HP fic where it is the holidays and not many students are left behind – in fact, it is only Harry, Neville, Pansy, Blaise, Luna and Draco.

Harry and Draco separately get the idea to go to RoR to think about their lives. Neville decides to go and work on his studies. Pansy and Blaise wanna make out. Luna decides to throw her own miniature party. When all six run into each other directly in front of the room, wands are drawn… except Harry's and Draco's. Harry is too tired and Draco is too annoyed. He shouts a very loud HEY to grab everyone's attention.

"We're the only students here and I have a massive headache. Let's just _all_ go in, alright?"

Pansy and Blaise readily agree, deciding to postpone their romp in sake of being on good terms with Malfoy, who scares them a little when he's like this. Neville also agrees. Luna agrees because she really enjoys it when everyone's together. Harry looks strangely at the blonde then sighs.

"Yeah, okay. Let's share the room."

They all walk in and the door closes with a lock spell, then disappears. Neville freaks out but then Harry sees Draco's grinning face.

"What's there to smile about, Malfoy?"

"I wanted to play a game."

"What game?" Pansy immediately asks.

"A muggle game." He says, staring at Harry.

Everyone freezes then turns to stare at him. Harry is first to break the silence.

"You? You want to play a muggle game? Which one?"

"Truth or dare." He says simply and removes an empty fire whiskey bottle from his cloak before removing it completely.

Everyone else takes off their cloaks and Draco allows Harry to explain the rules to the other wizards, though Neville already knows how to play. The circle is set: Draco, Blaise, Neville, Harry, Pansy, and Luna. Draco spins first and it lands on Neville.

"Truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Whom did you lose your virginity to?"

Neville blanches. Draco slyly smirks and Pansy is all ears. "I, um, err, well, o, you see…"

"Me." Luna says nonchalantly. "It's okay, Neville."

Harry's jaw drops a little. Draco nods with a satisfied smile. Neville spins and it lands on Blaise. "Truth or dare?"

"Dare."

"Bite Malfoy's big toe."

Both boys stare back bewildered. Being Slytherins, there is no way they will pass up a dare. Draco removes his right shoe and sock and holds up his foot. Blaise bites down on Draco's toe. When the bite is too much, Draco kicks Blaise… nearly knocking him out. Draco quickly redresses himself.

He decides now they will play Categories. The rules are briefly explained and Draco has the spinner for this game too. Draco is first and gets truth, so Blaise gets to ask him a truth. "Change what physical feature about yourself?"

"My arms. I don't like my arms."

Blaise gets rhymes. Easy. Neville is new to this and picks 'cow.'

"How, brow, meow." Blaise replies lazily.

Draco takes 'rhymes' off the category list. Neville's turn. He gets Dare. Harry dares him to mime out his worst date. It ends with his date flailing on the ground like a fish.

"Did you poison her?" Pansy asks, giggling.

"Or did you turn her into a fish?" Draco groans.

Neville sheepishly mimes. It is Harry's turn. He gets Truth. Pansy asks him if he's got a crush on anyone in the room. He immediately flushes and nods, avoiding all eye contact at any cost. Pansy's turn. She gets truth. Luna asks her why she's so clingy. Pansy doesn't answer and forgoes her turn. Luna's turn and she gets dare. Draco dares her to accio Snape into the room. She does so but he is only clad in a towel. He stands in shock at the six kids surrounding him then Luna sends him back. Everyone, including Draco, are howling with laughter.

Blaise decides they are now directly playing Dares. It is Draco's turn. Luna dares him to switch clothes with her. She is already getting undressed and Neville is watching. Draco swallows his humility and begins to undress as well. Blaise, Neville and Pansy are focused on Luna, while Harry is shyly focused on Draco while pretending to look at Luna. Draco notices but says nothing.

Blaise's turn. Draco dares him to give Neville a lap dance for ten seconds. Neville struggles with this but it seems Blaise rather enjoys it. Blaise dares Neville to give Harry a ten-second neck massage. It is awkward for both Gryffindors. Neville dares Harry and Pansy to pretend to be each other for the rest of the game. Harry (pretending to be Pansy) dares Pansy (pretending to be Harry) to French kiss Luna. They do so easily. After which, Luna turns back.

"Wow, Harry. You're a great kisser!"

Pansy (pretending to be Harry) flushes then dares Luna (dressed like Draco) to remove Blaise's shirt with her teeth. Luna never turns down a dare and prides herself in this. Blaise is excited and Draco is having fun. Then Luna (dressed like him) dares Draco (dressed like her) to sit on Harry's lap, toward Harry (pretending to be Pansy) and hug him for the next three turns. Draco (dressed like Luna) blushes feverishly but makes his move and Harry (pretending to be Pansy) allows it.

Luna then says they will be playing a Game of Truths. To make things interesting, Pansy accios several bottles of fire whiskey. Six full ones. Answer the truth or down a swig. Then Blaise waves a truth-telling charm over the room so no one can lie. The circle still goes Harry (pretending to be Pansy), Pansy (pretending to be Harry), Luna (dressed like Draco), Draco (dressed like Luna and sitting on Harry), Blaise (shirtless) and Neville (still mortified from having the privilege to see up his Potions professor's towel when accioed from the shower). The empty bottle is spun by Draco – still clinging onto Harry.

It lands on Pansy. "Do you fancy girls?"

"Some of them. But I fancy certain boys as well." She grins triumphantly around.

She spins. It lands on Neville. "What kind of name is 'Trevor' for a toad?"

He shrugs. "I dunno. I saw on the telly Frankie the Frog, so I thought Trevor sounded good for a toad."

He spins and it lands on Luna. "Did you get into the House you wanted?"

She takes a gulp of her drink. Neville shyly smiles.

"I guess that's a 'no' then." Draco chuckles. Luna glares at him then spins. It lands on Pansy again.

"Have you ever kissed a teacher?"

"Yes, and it was awful. I didn't even get my grade changed." She pouts.

She spins and it lands on Draco/Harry.

"Since you're both on the same place, I'll ask a double question for both of you. How many girls have you shagged and how many boys?"

"Ever?" Draco asks.

"At Hogwarts." She amends.

"Seven girls." Draco answers.

"Zero boys." Harry answers. "And one girl."

"Draco, we're waiting!" Pansy says sweetly.

"Three boys." He finally answers.

He spins the bottle and it lands back to them. Harry looks over to him questionably.

"Who did you shag? Here?"

Draco blanches with a feverish red blush. He bows his head then begins to speak.

"Pansy, Millicent, Goyle… Cho…"

"Cho Chang?" Harry has to ask. "The Ravenclaw girl?"

"That's four questions and you're only allowed one, Potter." He glares at the boy he is holding. "But, yes. After you."

"After me?"

"She was your first and you were hers. We only shagged after."

"How do you know?"

"She said I was rougher than her first. When I pressed, she said her first was 'Harry Potter' and I had conflicted emotions on the matter."

"Oh. Never mind the girls, then. Who were the other two boys?"

"Pushy, pushy, Potter. Let's see, that would be Finnegan and…"

"Seamus? A Gryffindor?" Blaise sounds disappointed. "Please tell me the other was from another house!"

"Sorry, no."

"Who was it?" Neville desperately wants to know.

"This doesn't leave this room." He declares, unwrapping himself from Harry and threatening everyone there.

Luna and Neville are spooked. Pansy and Blaise are nervous. Harry is agitated but willing to do as the blond says and keep it between them. Malfoy takes in a rather large and shaky breath and finally mutters "Weasley."

"Ron?" Harry gasps.

Draco shakes his head.

"Fred?" He gasps again.

Draco shakes his head.

"George?" Luna asks this time.

Draco shakes his head then starts bawling. "I was drunk and I thought he was someone else!"

"Hey, buddy." Blaise says. "At least you didn't shag a Hufflepuff."

This makes Malfoy cry harder. "But I shagged the Head of House!"

"You shagged Sprout?" Pansy gags.

"Pomona Sprout?" Neville is shocked.

"Who did you think George was?" Harry asks.

Instead of answering, Draco lifts his head and leans in. He catches Harry off guard and shoves his tongue down the other boy's throat. By the time Harry finally catches on to what is happening, Draco draws away and sits across from him, as per original game play.

"You thought he was me. You like me?"

The games are officially over. Luna walks across the circle and gives Neville a big kiss on the lips. They leave the room hand-in-hand. Then Pansy walks over to Blaise.

"I do fancy girls, but I also fancy you."

He gives her a quick peck on the kips. "That's quite alright. I fancy boys but I also fancy you quite right."

They pounce on the bed. Harry and Draco are still on the floor. Draco is immobile. He has a very red face and stares at the floor, still dressed like Luna. Harry is no longer acting like Pansy yet he is intensely watching the blond Slytherin. His head is tilted as he starts crawling toward him.

"I fancy you, Draco."

They are several inches apart and Draco's eyes snap in place to Harry when he says those words. Without waiting a further minute, Draco suddenly tackles Harry. Luna and Neville are shagging in the dungeons. Pansy and Blaise are shagging on a bed in the Room of Requirement. Draco and Harry are madly shagging on the floor, though it gets moved to the Great Hall – on the Hufflepuff's table.

The next morning comes and the students and faculty are returning to Hogwarts. Snape is first in the dungeons and sees a naked Ravenclaw-Gryffindor pair in his Slytherin office. He is disgusted and apparates himself out. During so, he bumps into Dumbledore, down by the library. He is helping Mrs. Pince with a strange matter. Upon entering, the librarian, headmaster and Head of Slytherin see two near-naked Slytherins asleep on a stack of books. Mrs. Pince is horrified and faints on the spot. Snape grins a little and Dumbledore… well, he's Dumbledore.

The students come racing out of the Great Hall, nearly trampling the teachers from the sights they had seen. Several ghosts ramble out as well. Then some teachers see and run out too. Snape is a tad nervous but decides to see, knowing it has to have something to do with Malfoy, since he didn't go home and neither had the others they've caught. Snape, Dumbledore and MacGonagall walk in and immediately see the source. Harry is naked lying flat on his back against the Hufflepuff table. Draco is also naked, grinding hard. They are hardcore shagging under a cone of silencio.

Dumbledore breaks the silence with a powerful reversal spell just as both boys reach their climax. Draco falls atop Harry and remains there. When he looks up and sees their faces he grins. "Harry, we've got an audience."

Harry looks up, fully expecting to find Luna or Blaise. Instead seeing two Head of Houses and the headmaster, he gives out a yelp and attempts to free himself from Draco's embrace. Draco keeps him pinned down however with a smile. A contagious smile. They start up again, damned of consequence. MacGonagall turns to Snape as if he is supposed to do something so he wraps his arms around her and starts kissing her carousingly. Dumbledore smiles as the two Head teachers climb onto the table for a make out session as well. Draco and Harry later get detention together… and another story takes off then.

 **Yep! That happened! Please leave reviews!**


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